Undecided?

I haven't written on this blog in a few months now.

I'd like to think it's not because of a lack of things to say, but rather because of an overabundance: a lot of my free time has been consumed with following the presidential elections, and it's only gotten worse as the clock has ticked closer to November 4th.

Every week I feel eager to write something about the election, but then suddenly, the news cycle turns over, and my chosen subject has become old-hat. Sarah Palin trips on a rock, suggests the rock has been palling around with terrorists, and I'm back to square-one.

Keeping up with the delirious pace of the news media is often more trouble than it's worth. It's taken a lot of my time and energy that might have been better applied to, say, building a ship-in-a-bottle, reading the complete works of Leo Tolstoy, learning the cello, or painting my bedroom. Or sleeping.

But sometimes, being a political- and media-junkie yields something insightful - or, better yet, provides some much-needed humor.

Here's an except of David Sedaris' take on undecided voters, from a recent issue of The New Yorker:

To put them (undecided voters) in perspective, I think of being on an airplane. The flight attendant comes down the aisle with her food cart and, eventually, parks it beside my seat. "Can I interest you in the chicken?" she asks. "Or would you prefer the platter of s*** with bits of broken glass in it?"

To be undecided in this election is to pause for a moment and then ask how the chicken is cooked.

Now, what Sedaris never says (in the October 27th issue) is which candidate is the chicken, and which is the platter of you-know-what.

But either way, his point is well-taken: what remaining avenues are there to be undecided?

After almost two years of non-stop campaigning from both parties, the choices we have for President have been exhaustively explored. No detail has proven too minor, too incendiary, or too absurd for our consideration. (Obama's flag pin, anyone? How about Palin's wardrobe?)

At this point - just "hours from the first polls closing," MSNBC said today - we have had an endless feast of policy debates, editorials and talking points from which to distill our own opinions. On both sides, many voters have so staunchly entrenched their decision that the mere thought of the alternative is practically scandalous. (And I should probably count myself in this group.)

For me, I'd liken the 2008 campaign to a sports championship, writ large. From the pre-primary season to now, the eve of the big election, my feelings have ranged from frustration to impatience to near-euphoria. I've only deepened my hope to see my team win in the final round, but at some point, it all has to be over.

No matter how the exit polls, electoral votes, and dangling chads fall, I'm looking forward to living in a post-election nation. It'll be fun to think about something else.

I'll probably give myself at least a few days vacation from the ups-and-downs of the political world - maybe a whole week! - before I cave in to the relentless siren song of news-magazines, the blogosphere, and cable news.

Because you know, 2012 will be here sooner than you think.